Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
