dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
