none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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