oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
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