are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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