I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
