seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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