READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
my sisters under your porch take her home
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
