i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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