i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
