I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize