I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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