I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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