I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
my liver is dry heaving
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
