shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
