And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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