Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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