At least make sure they are 18
Why
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize