I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
no. you can't hotbox the world.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
