By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
