There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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