Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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