Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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