I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
As shirtless as possible
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
