all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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