he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
