one two three fourrrrnication!
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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