so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize