I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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