Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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