Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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