can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Randomize