question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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