the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
