Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize