porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
