Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
