I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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