She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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