i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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