He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
