uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize
