People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
