Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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