I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
