the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize