Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
