you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
