can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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