Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
